Sunday, November 1
New Paltz · Every first Sunday of November
An afternoon to remember the people we've lost, together.
The idea
Most grief happens quietly. A private anniversary. A grave visit nobody else knows about. A name we stop saying because we're not sure anyone wants to hear it.
Reverence Day turns that around. For one afternoon each fall, a whole town remembers at once: flowers on the graves, photos on a shared table, music between the rows, and neighbors who have never met standing a few steps apart, thinking about the same thing.
It's inspired by Día de los Muertos, when families in Mexico spend the first days of November with the people they've lost instead of only mourning them. Less somber. More grateful. Open to anyone who is missing someone.
This is my dream… to take time the first Sunday of every November to remember all of those who have passed before us.
Pattie Steffens, who started Reverence DaySunday, 1 to 3 PM
No speeches, no ceremony, nothing to sit through. Stop by for five minutes or stay the whole two hours.
Buckets of them, donated by local florists and orchards. Set them on a grave here, or take them home for someone buried somewhere else.
Bring a photo of someone you love. It sits with everyone else's for the afternoon.
Local musicians play through the afternoon, as they have for years.
Donated by area farms and orchards.
Your people don't need to be buried here. Come for anyone you're missing, wherever they rest.
What to bring
“All you need to bring is reverence and an open heart.”Pattie Steffens
If you'd like to bring a little more:
Where it came from
In Mexico, families lay paths of marigold petals so the people they've lost can find their way home. This one runs from a single grave in New Paltz to wherever you're reading this.
Pattie Steffens lost her daughter, Alicia, who is buried here at New Paltz Rural Cemetery. In the years after, the cemetery became a place Pattie wanted to be, and she joined its board.
A retired language teacher, Pattie read about how cultures around the world remember their dead. Día de los Muertos stayed with her.
She asked local florists and farms for flowers, asked musicians to play, and opened the cemetery on the first Sunday of November to anyone missing someone.
More than a decade later, the florists still donate, the musicians still come, and Pattie is still the one making the calls.
Hudson Valley One has been writing about it for years.
By proclamation, the first Sunday of every November is Reverence Day in town.
1 to 3 PM at 81 Plains Road. Bring a photo, a flower, or just yourself.
Get directionsPattie's hope has always reached past one cemetery: a day when everyone, everywhere, stops to remember the people who came before them. New Paltz has set the day aside. It doesn't have to be the only place that does.
Wherever you are
Reverence Day doesn't need a cemetery. Set their photo on your table. Put out their favorite flower, or make the dish they always made. Light a candle at dusk and say their name.
Put the first Sunday of November on your calendar, for good.
Send this to one person who's missing someone this year.
Add their name to the memory table this Sunday?
Past years
A few afternoons from years past. There's room for one more.
With thanks
Every flower, song and refreshment on Sunday is donated. Thank you to the florists, orchards, farms, kitchens and musicians who give to Reverence Day year after year, and to the New Paltz Rural Cemetery for opening its grounds.
In the news: Hudson Valley One, 2015 · 2021 · 2022
En español
Reverence Day está inspirado en el Día de los Muertos. Acompáñenos el domingo 1 de noviembre, de 1 a 3 de la tarde, en el New Paltz Rural Cemetery, 81 Plains Road, New Paltz.
Habrá flores gratis para las tumbas de sus seres queridos o para llevar a casa, música en vivo y una mesa para las fotos de quienes ya no están. No hay discursos ni ceremonias. Venga cinco minutos o quédese toda la tarde. Todos son bienvenidos.
Solo traiga reverencia y un corazón abierto.